How putting negative labels round the necks of children and young people can affect them for life.
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This demonstrates the dangers of assuming that anti-social five-year-olds are the criminals or drug abusers of tomorrow.’
There is a theory that if an individual is told they are bad and if they hear it enough times, that person may come to believe that they are indeed “bad.” When that happens, they may be more likely to engage in disruptive and antisocial behaviours.
Labels have the power to define what an individual will become. They directly impact our beliefs about our abilities, meaning an individual, once labelled, will expect the same outcome from themselves in similar situations.
Labels have the power to define what an individual will become. They directly impact our beliefs about our abilities, meaning an individual, once labelled, will expect the same outcome from themselves in similar situations.
Encouraging personal growth: what to say, and what not to say
It is possible, and indeed positive, to resist categorising children by their characteristics or abilities. We can do this by keeping in mind the impact that our words can have, and by learning to address children’s issues through communication and timely positive reinforcement.
For example, a young person may struggle to keep their personal belongings and space organised. Instead of saying “you’re so messy”, we can offer to help them organise or tidy up, or say something along the lines of “try and tidy your room, I’m sure you can handle it but let me know if you need a hand.”
Statements like “you are helpful to me” can also highlight a person’s unique worth beyond any specific achievements. If we want to tell a child they are good at a particular task without rewarding mere obedience we can say something like “I’m so pleased to see how much effort you put into finishing that” or “I saw helping your friend, that was kind of of you.” Instead of saying “you’re talented” we can say “I can tell you like drawing. Would you like to try out some new techniques or colours?”
Importantly, praise and positive reinforcement should come at the exact moment in which the action happens: by giving immediate recognition we reinforce the connection between a behaviour and its positive response. In this way, praise or rewards are linked to the action itself, and not to the child’s identity, personality or intrinsic worth.
Think about the consequences that negative labelling can have on children and young people